Cancer Isn’t a War

I found a note to myself the other day. I have no idea if I stole these words from someone else or I thought of them. Often while driving I have blog ideas and I have to quickly write a note and stick it to something. I found a note that said “Cancer isn’t a War and I am not a Soldier.”

Now, as I sit down to try to write a zillion blog posts (this happens when I’m going on a writing retreat, which is generally where there isn’t electronic device distractions) I read my yellow sticky and try to recall why this resonated and what I wanted to say about it. Who knows? I’ll have to just go with what I want to say now.

Cancer isn’t a war. I have not spent any time fighting my cancer. I have viewed it as a wake up call. Tried to truly change things in my life which drag me into a deep, dark hole. When I first got my diagnosis I went to several support groups. People sitting in a room talking about resources for seeking out obscure treatments, how to get into trials for medications and such. These groups were much too depressing for me. Then I found out about “Wellness Within“, a wonderful non-profit support center with a definite focus on the positive. I took meditation classes, cooking classes, drumming, and “how to survive the holidays.” This is where I attended my first 5Rhythms dance class, which I rank as one of the best things that has ever happened for me.

A good source of support has also been several of the FB groups I joined. But even here, people die. And a glitch about social media is people disappear for all kinds of reasons and you never know why. I was thankful for a recent post from the daughter of a women I had “met” giving the group a status update.

If I am a soldier in the war on cancer, it is only from a spot that I wish all wars were fought. The spot of making improvements and accepting things and moving forward. It is the only way to keep the fear at bay.